In a convention center filled with sparkling pink Hannah Montana accessories and lace-patterned gift wrap, Laurel and I were startled to find an outpost of pure unadulterated hostility lurking in the aisles of this year’s National Stationery Show. One minute we were admiring letterpressed greeting cards, the next minute we found ourselves locking eyes with Angry Tradeshow Man, a curmudgeonly fella unable to grasp the concept of discretion. There he sat in his booth, up front and center, arms crossed with a creepy, frightening scowl. (I’m sure if we got close enough, we would’ve heard a low-decibel snarl escaping his lips). I felt bad for him because, obviously, he was having a bad show. But I felt worse for his neighbors because everyone was scurrying past him, I assume, to avoid being turned to stone.
As was only prudent, I returned an hour later to nonchalantly walk past Angry Tradeshow Man’s booth. And as reliable as plastic food in the window of a sushi restaurant, he remained in the same spot with the same menacing grimace shellacked on his face. I walked by another hour later (hey, I was on my way to the bathroom!), again, as was only prudent. And again, the same plastic sushi face. Naturally, I took no joy in doing any of this.
Okay, so this guy was an extreme case, but there are many poignant lessons we can learn from him–the most powerful is that attitude is everything when you’re hawking your goods. Giving off the faintest whiff of disappointment, anger, or boredom is the fastest way for your booth to contract a virulent strain of cooties. So channel your inner surfer (mine’s named E.Z.) and adopt a healthy sense of humor and a laidback attitude. (Get a Magic Tan if it helps you get in “the role”.) Luck can strike at any time, so keep your attitude upbeat because sometimes all it takes is one account or one press bite to make your entire show worthwhile.